![]() ![]() I pray that the soul of my dearly beloved child be bound up in the bond of eternal life, together with the souls of all the righteous that are in Thy keeping. Though my heart still grieves, may I, who have known the joys of parenthood, bring love and cheer into the lives of others. O merciful God, Giver of life, Thou hast recalled what is Thine own, and hast taken him (her) into Thy loving care and keeping. Though he (she) is no longer in our midst, his (her) memory shall forever be enshrined in my heart. The passage of years will never fill the void in my heart, nor can time soften the pain of bereavement. Though few and brief were the years wherein I rejoiced with my beloved child, many indeed were the blessings he (she) brought into our home. How I delighted in his (her) physical and mental growth. Looking for a way to say Mourner’s Kaddish in a minyan? My Jewish Learning’s daily online minyan gives mourners and others an opportunity to say Kaddish in community and learn from leading rabbis.Almighty Father, as I stand at the grave of my beloved child, I tenderly recall the joys that he (she) gave me during his (her) lifetime. Sign up for a Journey Through Grief & Mourning: Whether you have lost a loved one recently or just want to learn the basics of Jewish mourning rituals, this 8-part email series will guide you through everything you need to know and help you feel supported and comforted at a difficult time. Reprinted with permission from Saying Kaddish: How to Comfort the Dying, Bury the Dead, & Mourn as a Jew ( Schocken Books). In this way, Kaddish expresses the essence of Judaism. In words and through practice, Kaddish insists that the mourner turn away from death and choose life. Although these words have been studied and analyzed for centuries, every mourner finds new meaning in them, year by year, and line by line.īut the bottom line is startlingly clear. Through study and thought, reading and discussion, Kaddish demands that the mourner engage, connect and forge a personal connection to it. Kaddish requires that the mourner wrestle with the text. It even speaks - in its silence - about the predominant Jewish view of the afterlife.īut the language of the prayer is not transparent. Kaddish addresses the meaning of life and death, immortality and redemption, the purpose and efficacy of prayer, community, and the ultimate goal of peace. The meaning only comes clear when given communal voice.Įven so, the words are not insignificant. The text is secondary to the emotional experience of its recitation. The truth is that the sounds of the words are more important than their definitions. The mystery of Kaddish is revealed every time it is spoken aloud with others. This is not as mechanical as it sounds, because it is simply impossible to understand the impact or value of saying Kaddish without first doing it. Which is why Kaddish is always transliterated, so that everyone can participate, regardless of whether they can read the Hebrew letters or know what they are saying. It is enough that the mourner just “do the mitzvah” of saying the prayer with nine other Jews. But halacha, or Jewish law, does not require belief in the words - or even understanding. Judaism has always been far less concerned with belief than with action or mitzvah, which means “commandment” or “sacred obligation.” The tradition mandates saying Kaddish, with clear directions about how, where, and when it should be said. Atheists say Kaddish.Īs inconsistent as it may seem, this does not offend Jewish religious sensibilities. Jewish mourners begin saying Kaddish at the funerals of their loved ones, and continue reciting it for the rest of their lives. And yet, for centuries Jewish tradition has placed this prayer in the mouths of people who have no taste for praise. After all, this is the same God who ordained or permitted the death of a loved one. “Blessed, praised and honored, extolled and glorified, adored and exalted.” “ Kaddish” means “holy” and the prayer is a doxology - a listing of God’s holy attributes. Nor is there anything about life after death in these brief lines, which seem to echo with loss and longing.įor most Jews, the literal meaning of Kaddish is either opaque or troubling. It does not speak of loss, sadness, or bereavement. ![]() It sounds like comfort and feels like a transcendent embrace, and yet, the prayer that is synonymous with Jewish mourning does not mention death or consolation. My Jewish Learning is a not-for-profit and relies on your help Donate ![]()
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